Love + Sex

Thursday, November 26, 2009

Myths of Dating: Is the 2-Day Rule Really True?


Playing games and dating come pretty much nervous sweaty palm in sweaty palm. (And, no we don't mean Twister.) As much as you can say "be yourself" and "just act naturally," it just simply won't happen at first. In lieu of this fact, we've grown a plethora of dumb number-related rules about dating. It's okay to sleep with him after three dates. You don't call for at least two days, but never wait more than four. If she has seven toes, she's great in bed. (That one I made up, and is kind of gross, actually. I take it back.)

With these rules come the insecurities about these rules. If you meet a guy, nervously give him your digits, should you be annoyed when he waits exactly two days to call you, or impressed that he waited that exact suggested amount of time? What if you don't want to sleep with him after three dates? Before your life turns into a neurotic Woody Allen flick, complete with tics and annoying life musings, ("but...you seem so removed") take a look at our breakdown of the date rules that work...and which don't.



The Three Date Rule


I'm not really sure who decided that you should sleep with someone after three dates (I think a few '90s sitcoms got together and decided it was a thing), but it's absolutely ridiculous. Sleep with someone when you feel like sleeping with someone. Whether you guys got a little overexcited about liking each other and did it the first night, or whether you decide to wait months or even, ahem, until you get married, the relationship will work if it's meant to be. Carpe diem...plus, if you've been sleeping with every guy who makes it to three dates, and it hasn't been working for you...maybe slow down a little.

Our resident guy expert Ryan Phillips tells you what MEN REALLY WANT



The Two Day Rule

I've had countless conversations with guy friends about this; when it's okay to call. When it comes down to it, the day after is fine...a week later isn't; by then we've forgotten about you. What also isn't okay is calling ten minutes after getting said number, then ten times after that because we didn't pick up. That's if guy decides to actually get the balls to call, instead of the super-annoying two day text...or a Facebook message where he decided to just type in a smiley face (that seriously happened to me yesterday, and definitely did not warrant a response. Frown-ey face, or otherwise).

Sidenote: This being said...there's this new thing where the guy makes you call him in front of him, so then he has your number. This is a sneaky way of making sure you're not wrong-numbering him...and we're fully aware of it.



The Rule of Pay

I was always taught that whoever asks who out was who paid for the date. That being said, I've shamefully adopted a few techniques to see if, given the opportunity, he will pay. The Fake Wallet Reach, where you reach for your bag slowly, waiting for him to stop you. Or the "No, You Go Ahead," where you let him in front of you at the movies, and see how many tickets he buys. However, it's nice to acknowledge whoever pays, and do something in return (no, not that). If he shells out the money for movie tickets, offer to buy popcorn or something. You'll look appreciative, and less high maintenance.



The Friend Zone Rule

Guys are taught (by other guys, always a fool-proof plan) that if he doesn't make a move on you within a certain amount of time, it's too late and they've moved into The Friend Zone, never to return. There is a certain amount of truth to this...if you wait too long, we don't want to risk ruining "the friendship." However, chemistry is chemistry, and if it's there, it won't fizzle out for a while. As long as you don't talk about bodily functions, or the breast size of our sister in front of us, your chance is still there. However, sooner is always better than later...just don't Facebook us. Please.

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From the Community…

Comments 1-10 of 21
  • Anne's Avatar
    Posted by Anne Tue Nov 3, 2009 7:58am PST

    ugh, the Fake Wallet Reach! know that one too well

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  • CowboyPants's Avatar
    Posted by CowboyPants Tue Nov 3, 2009 7:58am PST

    I hate the 2-day call rule, but if a guy calls too soon, it seriously freaks me out

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  • SuhaniS's Avatar
    Posted by SuhaniS Tue Nov 3, 2009 8:06am PST

    Haha I hate the "sneaky" way of getting the number! 'Cause you can still delete theirs, but they have yours forevah.

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  • jasE's Avatar
    Posted by jasE Tue Nov 3, 2009 8:07am PST

    I think that women are thinking too hard about this, i doubt guys even notice

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  • Ayanna's Avatar
    Posted by Ayanna Tue Nov 3, 2009 8:12am PST

    I think that rules apply to certain situations not all. I think it definitely depends.

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  • Jesse's Avatar
    Posted by Jesse Tue Nov 3, 2009 8:12am PST

    So basically the rules are there are no rules

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  • Melanie's Avatar
    Posted by Melanie Tue Nov 3, 2009 8:12am PST

    I am traditional in the sense of men paying for the first date, but I am respectful in what I order and don't mind chipping in!

    Report Abuse
  • PartyDresses's Avatar
    Posted by PartyDresses Tue Nov 3, 2009 8:16am PST

    This gives me such a headache...I want to watch movies and eat ice cream and never leave my apartment.

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  • Shirley's Avatar
    Posted by Shirley Tue Nov 3, 2009 8:20am PST

    YES!!! 2 day rule is totally true.... you cant just go showing your emotions that early on

    Report Abuse
  • Alix's Avatar
    Posted by Alix Tue Nov 3, 2009 8:23am PST

    Ahh the friend zone

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Comments 1-10 of 21

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