Love + Sex

Saturday, November 28, 2009

Are You a Hot Chick?

First off, a huge congratulations to Jane! Jane's become one of my [virtual] mentors on the blog, and I love hearing her take on the world and I'm so, so, excited she's sharing her pregnancy journey on the blog!

And, in the spirit of mentorship and going to the experts to find the answers, I asked Jodi Lipper and Cerina Vincent, authors of the brand new book How to Love Like a Hot Chick: The Girlfriend to Girlfriend Guide to Getting the Love You Deserve, answer some of my relationship questions. Check out what THEY had to say about my frisky past and my current dates with the dude who loves Audrey movies!



What is a hot chick?
We want to redefine the term Hot Chick so that every woman out there starts to feel like one! We think that being a Hot Chick has nothing to do with looking like an airbrushed, artificially enhanced celebrity. Instead, we define a Hot Chick as a confident, passionate, honest woman who knows what she wants and gets it, is aware of her flaws but doesn't obsess over them, doesn't compete with other women, and uses all of her sexy power strictly for good. We were thrilled that our first book, How to Eat Like a Hot Chick, helped convince thousands of women that they are hot, and we hope that How to Love Like a Hot Chick will inspire many more women to start living, loving and feeling like the Hot Chicks they already are deep down inside!

As my blog readers know, I have a bit of a frisky past. But now I'm ready to settle down! Any tips to make sure I don't fall into my old habits of sleeping with a guy on the first date?
We are so excited that you had a fantastic, frisky heyday! But you can have just as much frisky fun in a monogamous relationship as you did as a sassy single girl. The most important way to make sure you don't fall into your old habits is to know exactly what you want in a man and in a relationship. You need to be crystal clear with yourself (and the universe) about what you want and what you don't want. We have a unique Build-A-Boyfriend program in our book, and after you've completed it, you'll know in your heart what kind of man will make you feel happy and fulfilled. Once you know that, sleeping with men that don't meet your criteria won't seem quite as interesting as it used to.

Our advice is that if you're looking to settle down, you should wait until at least the third date. That way, you'll be able to focus on the potential relationship without being distracted by all of the complications that sex can bring!

Right now, I'm sort of in a dating rut-I've been going on platonic dates with a guy who shares my love of Audrey Hepburn movies but we haven't made out at all-even though he's totally straight! Are there any tips you have in a situation like this for how to amp up the romance?
We're very sorry to say this, but we don't think this guy is the one for you! We want a Hot Chick like you to find someone you're so passionate about that you can't get through the opening credits to a movie without making out like crazy. Especially because of your frisky past, you'll need strong chemistry in order to be satisfied in a relationship, and we know that you can find that! It doesn't sound like this guy is getting your motor running and we don't want you to settle for that. However, don't give up too easy. If you like him as a person, you should give it a shot. Don't be afraid to make the first move! Go ahead and tackle him during Breakfast at Tiffany's and see what happens. But if there's any awkwardness or hesitation on his part, dump him immediately and focus on finding someone who's more interested in you than Ms. Hepburn.


I want to be in a serious relationship, but I don't want to scare guys away. Any suggestions for how to approach dates with my goals in mind?
The fact that you want to be in a relationship will only scare away guys who don't want to be in a relationship, and that is a good thing! By running away and hiding, those guys are actually saving you a lot of time and energy that you might have otherwise wasted on someone who clearly doesn't want the same thing as you. There are plenty of guys out there who want to be in relationships, too, and being honest with yourself and them about what you want will help you find the right one. As long as you don't do anything creepy like talk about what your babies would look like on your first date, you should feel free to tell him what you're looking for like the confident, empowered Hot Chick that you are!

Seriously, I love these ladies! Also-SWEEPSTAKES ALERT-they've teamed up with the Booty Parlor folks to create a fantastic sweepstakes to win not only expert advice, but a ton of flirty, sexy products to help you access your inner vixen. You can enter to win here. Cool!


Posted by Alice

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Reprinted with Permission of Hearst Communications, Inc.
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From the Community…

Comments 1-10 of 11
  • kEsHK's Avatar
    Posted by kEsHK Mon Jan 12, 2009 2:35pm PST

    i hate all leaves

    Report Abuse
  • NikkiA's Avatar
    Posted by NikkiA Mon Jan 12, 2009 2:55pm PST

    fuuuuuukkkk looooovvvvvvvvveeeeeeeeee

    Report Abuse
  • Lacy L's Avatar
    Posted by Lacy L Mon Jan 12, 2009 5:44pm PST

    hey first of all i think that its dumb that guys think that they can say anything and get a girl to believe them.......well you guys have a rude awakening coming!!!!

    Report Abuse
  • Sunny's Avatar
    Posted by Sunny Tue Jan 13, 2009 3:10am PST

    Let them mans chase you trust me it worth it

    Report Abuse
  • Deanne's Avatar
    Posted by Deanne Tue Jan 13, 2009 9:10am PST

    I love my Baby Jake. Love at first sight just took a while for us to get together but now we are inseperable.

    Report Abuse
  • desilee19's Avatar
    Posted by desilee19 Tue Jan 13, 2009 9:37am PST

    I'm a hot chick and a hot mom. Not conceited, just factual. MILF!

    Report Abuse
  • Lauren's Avatar
    Posted by Lauren Tue Jan 13, 2009 10:24am PST

    People tell me I am hot but I don't believe it...

    Report Abuse
  • Shiny E's Avatar
    Posted by Shiny E Tue Jan 13, 2009 10:32am PST

    I dont think i am hot but alot of guys think so. I just consider myself cute. I am not conceited just convinced!

    Report Abuse
  • Diana's Avatar
    Posted by Diana Tue Jan 13, 2009 1:46pm PST

    Heck yeah I am hot, and the older I get, the hotter I am. Jeez, in my teens I felt like such an ugly duckling, in my twenties, I discovered that being hot has nothing to do with looks and now I am entering my 30s and I feel and look better than ever. As long as I think I am hot, some people in this world my share that opinion. (and if they don't who cares. I know who I am and what I want and the people around me enjoy my company...the rest really doesn't matter)

    Report Abuse
  • Mariel's Avatar
    Posted by Mariel Tue Jan 13, 2009 4:21pm PST

    Confidence is huge!!! If you're confident in your body, self, and personality, guys will be instantly attracted to you. So try it...it works for me :D

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