Love + Sex

Wednesday, November 25, 2009

7 Greatest Things About Having A Small Rack

Alan Wieder became obsessed with the size of his "package" in 2005. Convinced that it was the smallest in the world, he spent the entire year poring over statistics, measuring his manhood (up to 20 times a day), and yes, even trying to increase his size through questionable contraptions. Size, Apparently, Matters More To Guys

Four years later, after going through lots of therapy and penning a memoir about his neurotic obsession entitled Year of the c--- , Wieder is finally at peace with his size. In fact, he's even able to joke about it. He recently published a list of the "13 Greatest Things About Having A Small Penis" on Asylum (with items including: "10. You can relate to women better because you more or less have a vagina." and "7. You have a fourteen percent better chance of talking your significant other into backdoor action.") Backdoor For Beginners

We like Wieder's positive attitude and sense of humor. So much, that after reading his list, we couldn't help but feel inspired to write our own about another small something that gets its share of uncharitable jokes. We've decided to call it: "7 Greatest Things About Having A Small Rack."

7. While all your girlfriends complain about their giant drooping breasts reaching their knees, you can feel good about the fact that your small drooping breasts will never make it past your waist.

6. Your chest has that chic Kate Moss look, and you didn't even need to snort cocaine to make it happen.

5. Two words, with regard to men: eye contact.

4. No need to buy new bras after fourth grade.

3. Hours of fun as you and your man fight over who has the bigger breasts. How To Love Your Breasts During Sex

2. Nothing impeding the fabulous view of your gut.

1. The joy of being described by others as a girl with a pretty face and a really great personality.

Readers, what are some other benefits to having a small chest?

More from YourTango:

Written by Kristen Meinzer for YourTango.com.
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From the Community…

Comments 1-10 of 131
  • farra's Avatar
    Posted by farra Tue Sep 1, 2009 3:32pm PDT

    This not funny really who wants small breast or a small penis? Not me, glad I was blessed..

    Report Abuse
  • TJ S's Avatar
    Posted by TJ S Tue Sep 1, 2009 7:15pm PDT

    Two more benefits:

    Not having bad problems due to big ones

    Not dropping as much sauce on your shirts, making you look like a glutton while eating

    Hahaha

    But seriously, I like small ones as well as large ones and I'm more likely to look at smaller ones. I think they can make a woman sexier looking in some cases. So, you have a fan!!! LOL

    Report Abuse
  • J's Avatar
    Posted by J Tue Sep 1, 2009 9:24pm PDT

    you don't have to wear a bra! just wearing a fitted tank top, while around your other half...and feeling a bit chilly? hmmm that would get their attention :D

    (I've had a larger chest.... and now I feel incredibly sexy with my little ones)

    Report Abuse
  • Someoneelse's Avatar
    Posted by Someoneelse Tue Sep 1, 2009 9:47pm PDT

    I can sleep on my stomach!

    Report Abuse
  • Robyn's Avatar
    Posted by Robyn Tue Sep 1, 2009 10:01pm PDT

    i like my big ones, my body type would not fit with little ones, i just wish they were the same size

    Report Abuse
  • Sa's Avatar
    Posted by Sa Tue Sep 1, 2009 10:13pm PDT

    I agree small breast are great, I'm a B36 ( small compared to my body size) and i like being small, i can pretent i'm a boy if i wanted too. and my bf is a boob man he doesn't mine my size

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  • T-von's Avatar
    Posted by T-von Tue Sep 1, 2009 11:03pm PDT

    I'm not really a boob person but I will say that I don't too much care about the size. If they are so small that I can barely tell that you are a female, I will question you and strive to confirm it. If they are so huge they can crush beer cans, I will run for my life! Anywhere in between and I am completely content with the size of a woman's boobs.

    Report Abuse
  • Sadie's Avatar
    Posted by Sadie Wed Sep 2, 2009 2:07am PDT

    I've met several men that said they actually prefer smaller breasts.

    And that breast implants are a deal breaker for them.

    Report Abuse
  • Bob V's Avatar
    Posted by Bob V Wed Sep 2, 2009 2:32am PDT

    Another great thing about small breasts: They double in size when you get cold...

    Report Abuse
  • None's Avatar
    Posted by None Wed Sep 2, 2009 5:19am PDT

    You have to accept what you got and learn to be happy with it, but I am probably just saying this cuz I was blessed with large breats and I would never want to be flat-chested, to me breasts, is part of being defined as a woman, I am straight, but I LOVE seeing women with hour glass figures, boobs and ass, A "C" to me is efficient to be attractive for me, but I am a 38D, I don't care what men think, most men are ass men anyways, and that I don't have and don't care, but I love my boobs, I wouldn't trade them for anything, each has its pros & cons, but rather have a body than be a boy figure.

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