Healthy Living

Sunday, October 12, 2008

Three tips to conquer road rage

Feelings are much like waves, we can't stop them from coming but we can choose which one to surf. ~Jonatan Mårtensson

Just the other day, I was a passenger riding in the car with my friend Rodney. Rodney is a nice, successful guy with a Type A, go-getter personality. We were driving along, having a normal conversation, when all of the sudden, a car cut in front of us. I thought to myself, “What a jerk” as I watched the car speed away. But my friend Rodney had a reaction you could say was less than pleasant. He totally freaked out, screamed every curse word in the book, and then took off in wild pursuit of the guy who cut us off. I was downright frightened. Rodney followed this other driver for 2 miles taunting, screaming, and honking like a madman. When he finally settled down, I felt like I’d gotten stuck on a roller coast loop which kept going ‘round and ‘round and ‘round…such was the intensity of Rodney’s anger.

Maybe you know someone who is similarly set off by the actions of other drivers. Here are 3 ways to get a handle on Road Rage and avoid its unfortunate and sometimes dangerous consequences:

1. LEAVE ROOM FOR ERROR

“Patience is passion tamed.” --Lyman Abbot

A Road Rager aggressively tailgating another driver leaves little room for error. One mistake and the tailgaiter crashes into the back of the other vehicle. The idea being that no matter how on top of things one might be, life doesn’t always go as planned. God forbid something happens, it need not be such a big deal. You shouldn’t have to “slam on the brakes” and explode into the red-lining emotions typical of a Road Rager. Just as you learn in driving school to leave a little “space cushion” between yourself and another driver, consider leaving a little space for life’s mishaps, obstacles, and bad days to unfold without causing a freak out.

2. UNDERSTAND ANGER

“Lust, anger, and greed. Those are the 3 soul-destroying gates of he-l.” Bhagavad Gita

Every single human being on the face of this earth is vulnerable to the life-changing effects of either lust, anger, or greed. So if anger is your Kryptonite, be careful, be aware, be proactive. In much the way that a tiny match can ignite a vast forest in flames, a little disruption can ignite a wonderful yet anger-prone human being into a hellraising demon on wheels (aka Road Rage). Understand what sparks your anger, know when you are particularly vulnerable (ie: tired, hungry, hungover), and at least “TRY” to be aware that an Incredible Hulk is lurking in your depths. "In a controversy, the instant we feel anger, we have already ceased striving for truth, and have begun striving for ourselves." (Abraham Heschel)

3. LET 'ER RIP...

“A riot is the language of the unheard.” Martin Luther King

An angry Road Rager has most likely grown accustomed to bottling up certain emotions.The result: something’s gotta be released often in very inconvenient circumstances. The cure: allow time and space to liberate pent-up emotion. Whether it’s a good workout, therapy, or the occasional cry-your-heart out moment, as David Borenstein said, “Dangerous is the man who has rationalized (and bottled) his emotions.”






by Yeah Dave (David Romanelli)

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From the Community…

Comments 1-10 of 14
  • J.P.'s Avatar
    Posted by J.P. Fri Jul 4, 2008 8:32am PDT

    YEAH!!! DO NOT GET IN THE CAR WITH MY HUSBAND !!! Ever !!!!!

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  • Kate's Avatar
    Posted by Kate Fri Jul 4, 2008 6:49pm PDT

    I try to tell myself that I don't know why the other person cut me off. What if that man is rushing to the hospital where his wife is giving birth? What if that woman got a call from her son or daughter and needed help? I know that is only the case for 1% of the crazy drivers out there, but it helps me stay calm and suppresses my desire for vengeance. It's also helpful to remember it's not about me and I can't take other people's driving personally.

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  • night owl's Avatar
    Posted by night owl Sat Jul 5, 2008 12:37am PDT

    MOST OF THE PROBLEMS PEOPLE GET INTO ON THE ROAD ARE OLD PEOPLE DRIVING IN THE WRONG LANE, IDIOTS CUTTING YOU OFF, AND BIG RIGS TRYING TO KILL YOU. I SAY MAKE THE OLD PEOPLE TAKE ANOTHER DRIVING TEST AT 65 AND EVERY 2 YRS. AFTER. TAKE THE CELL PHONES OUT OF YOUR HANDS WHEN YOU DRIVE, AND MAKE GOVERNERS MANDITORY FOR THE BIG RIGS. ALSO THAT THEY HAVE TO GO TO SCHOOL TO LEARN TO DRIVE FOR AT LEAST 2 YRS. THEN TAKE A VERY INTENSE TEST TOPASS, BEFORE THEY ARE ALLOWED TO GET THEIR LESSONS!

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  • night owl's Avatar
    Posted by night owl Sat Jul 5, 2008 12:37am PDT

    MOST OF THE PROBLEMS PEOPLE GET INTO ON THE ROAD ARE OLD PEOPLE DRIVING IN THE WRONG LANE, IDIOTS CUTTING YOU OFF, AND BIG RIGS TRYING TO KILL YOU. I SAY MAKE THE OLD PEOPLE TAKE ANOTHER DRIVING TEST AT 65 AND EVERY 2 YRS. AFTER. TAKE THE CELL PHONES OUT OF YOUR HANDS WHEN YOU DRIVE, AND MAKE GOVERNERS MANDITORY FOR THE BIG RIGS. ALSO THAT THEY HAVE TO GO TO SCHOOL TO LEARN TO DRIVE FOR AT LEAST 2 YRS. THEN TAKE A VERY INTENSE TEST TOPASS, BEFORE THEY ARE ALLOWED TO GET THEIR LESSONS!

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  • ger's Avatar
    Posted by ger Sat Jul 5, 2008 1:25am PDT

    Although at first thought this would be another DO and DONT list, I now believe this is one of the finest pieces of "Self Development" I've ever come accross. Not only you site the psychological aspect of the problem but also back your knowledge with quotes of inspired men.

    I think the root of the problem is that people have become impatient and/or lack the opportunity to vent. It would help to walk, when possible, instead.

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  • Somewhere in time's Avatar
    Posted by Somewhere in time Sat Jul 5, 2008 7:53am PDT

    I feel anger when I feel people are inconsiderate to others. This is a huge amount of what's going on daily on our highways. Examples are: people talking on the phone and driving at 60 mph in the left lane, someone pulling out in front of you only to drive 35 mph, people sitting at the stoplight who never seem to notice it's green until it's too late for anyone else to get through. I drive 90 miles round trip to work 5 days a week, so I have gradually built up my share of aggression. However, these people aren't only inconsiderate, they're dangerous. When they're paying so little attention to what's going on around them, how can they be good drivers?

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  • Cecily's Avatar
    Posted by Cecily Sat Jul 5, 2008 12:42pm PDT

    People also need to remember, when another driver does something stupid or inconsiderate, that they themselves have probably done that at least once, if only by accident. When someone's zipping in between cars trying to get as far ahead as they can, I try to consciously remember the last time I was desperately late for something important. When someone cuts me off turning left, I try to remember the one and only time that I didn't realize the lane next to me was also turning (because I'd never driven that street before). When someone seems distracted, I think of the dark, rainy night that I had to drive myself to the hospital to have an emergency c-section, and was trying to reach friends and family on my cell at the same time. The other driver could be deliberately and selfishly out to make everyone else's day difficult, OR they could have a real and urgent reason for what they just did. You never know.

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  • whiteoakmiracle's Avatar
    Posted by whiteoakmiracle Sat Jul 5, 2008 4:42pm PDT

    driving can release large amounts of adrenaline and normal safe driving doesn't burn it up. the hostility is hormonal. just remind yourself that with driving, staying safe makes you the WINNER!

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  • carlson6566@sbcglobal.net's Avatar
    Posted by carlson6566@sbcglobal.net Sat Jul 5, 2008 8:13pm PDT

    Driving a car or truck is the most dangerous activity most people engage in, think safety and kiss the ground when you get there.

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  • screamingfeather666's Avatar
    Posted by screamingfeather666 Sun Jul 6, 2008 9:06am PDT

    Prices have gone up on gas and insurance rates are not to far behind. I've changed my ways dramatically. Not easy. I quickly hum the melody of my favorite comedy- show, cartoon, etc. or make-up a funny excuse why that person did it.

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